Stuff I found on the Web
> Never trust a dog to watch your food.
> Patrick, age 10
> When your dad is mad and asks you,'Do I look stupid?' don't answer.
> Hannah, 9
> Never tell your mom her diet's not working.
> Michael, 14
> When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
> Taylia, 10
> Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac.
> Andrew, 9
> Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time.
> Kyoyo, 9
> You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
> Armir, 9
> Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
> Kellie, 11
> If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.
> Naomi, 15
> Felt markers are not good to use as lipstick.
> Lauren, 9
> Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.
> Joel, 10
> When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone.
> Alyesha, 13
> Never try to baptize a cat.
> Eileen, 8