Sunday, July 25, 2010

Is That A Drill In Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy To Be Scanned?

What would we do without the TSA keeping our skies safe? Our planes free from fingernail clippers and hair conditioner. I know we need them but a couple flights made me question their consistency.

I occasionally travel for work. When I go to the field I have to carry on my laptop case and boot bag.

On one trip they scanned my laptop bag. Sir. Please step into the cube. Huh? I look and they are rescanning my laptop case and pointing. Is that your bag? Yes. There are five agents now looking at the x-ray of my bag and digging around. It is amazing how many pockets and nooks are in those things. Sir, do you have a drill bit in your bag? Uhhh, I am a machinist, it is possible. They scanned again and after digging around about 10 minutes they pulled out a 3/8 inch diameter x 12 inch long drill bit. I thought oh crap I forgot that was in there and I am in trouble now. They started laughing(yes they laughed), motioning me to come get may bag. As I was putting my laptop back in my bag they handed me the drill back. Odd thing is it had been in my bags for 2 other trips. Good thing it weren’t a fingernail file.

I also carried my boot bag on one trip which included my safety harness lanyards. It has 2 huge hooks on each end for tying off while I am climbing. They just looked at them and cleared them.

I do appreciate the free pass but what’s the criteria? Maybe it’s just my southern charm. Of course the folks behind me weren’t so thrilled.

Ever had a personal search in TSA?

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Can you raed this?

Can you raed this? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.

I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

I recieved this in an Email. It didn't say whether being able to was good or bad.

Well how bout it? Could you?

Friday, July 9, 2010

My First Time

The sky was dark
The moon was high
All alone
Just her and I
Her hair so soft
Her eyes so blue
I knew just what
She wanted to do
Her skin so soft
Her legs so fine
I ran my fingers
Down her spine
I didn't know how
But I tried my best
To place my hand
Upon her breasts
I remember my fear
My fast beating heart
But slowly she spread
Her legs apart
And when she did it
I felt no shame
All at once
The white stuff came
At last it's finished
It's all over now
My first time
Milking a cow!